College students: get good at Excel and Powerpoint

If you're in college and looking to climb your way up the corporate ladder when you graduate, I have one small piece of advice that is yet another way to set yourself apart from the pack: learn MS Excel and PowerPoint inside-out.

When you start your first job, you're not going to be given a ton of responsibility. But, your goal should be to get noticed for how well you can do what you are asked to do. If a manger asks you to put together a spreadsheet or a presentation for them, you don't want it to take you three days and have it come out looking like a piece of junk.

It's easy not to pick these things up in college. I know presentations in school are often done in a group format, and the group will often settle on the Excel or PowerPoint expert to do up the spreadsheet and the presentation. In the short run, that's a nice way to do well on the project, but in the long run, if you are never that expert, you might go through college without learning what are without a doubt two of the biggest skills a new college grad can have.

A student with a business degree will have more opportunities in their first year to impress a boss with a well put-together presentation (deck, slideshow, or whatever else you might call it) than with their knowledge of Michael Porter's 5 Forces.

I admit this is low-level stuff, but this is a piece of advice I wish someone would have given me in college when there were so many learning resources around me.

I'm not saying you fall asleep in your competitive strategy class, but don't expect the CEO to ask your opinion on which markets to enter during your first year working at a Fortune 500 company.

Chances are if you make a name for yourself as someone good with these programs, many of the more senior workers who never learned how to use them properly will come to you to ask for your assistance. You will be seen as smart and competent, and you can get to know people you might otherwise not have come in contact with.

I'm not going to go over all of the things you need to know. You can read about those in a how-to book, or learn about them in any class worth its salt.

A few things I believe would set you apart in excel would be: using the TABLE function, using pivot tables, creating custom charts to standardize the way you show pie/line graphs (if your company does not already have a standard), learning how to get quick with keyboard shortcuts (quick tip on this: go to Wall Street Training's website and download the WST macros as well as the excel shortcuts pdf file), being able to create and format financial statements, mastering print settings (such as rows to repeat at top, set print area etc.) so your work looks good when you show it to someone, and using VLOOKUP/HLOOKUP. This is not an exhaustive list but a place for you to start.

When it comes to powerpoint, I'd say some of the key things are learning formatting, proper spacing for bullets and heights for letters (there's a lot more to this than you would think), standardizing layouts/templates, using the align functions to make sure pictures/shapes are perfectly lined up, getting colors perfect (a neat tool I like here is Color Cop which is free), pasting in tables etc. from excel, and in general just creating simple, pleasing formats. For practice, look for powerpoint presentations that may be posted on company websites and see if you can duplicate them from scratch. If you're going into finance, pay specific attention to the investor relations websites of public companies for good examples.

None of the above applies to anyone in visual/graphic arts. The kinds of presentations you'll create in these areas are likely much different from general business presentations.

If you cant figure out how to do something in MS office products, remember GOOGLE IS YOUR FRIEND. You can just google pretty much anything and find an answer very quickly. For example, google "how to shade every other row Excel 2007" and look at how many answers/tutorials you find.

If you really want to get fancy, you can also check out The Visual Display of Quantitative Information by Tufte. This is an intensive study on how human beings process data, and the best way to present it in a visual format. It is very theoretical, but I highly recommend reading the book and studying it a little because people often create ridiculous charts for no reason when something simpler and more elegant would do a better job of conveying a message. The book is not specific to Excel, but you can definitely use the info in it to help you to create better looking and more informative charts, graphs, and data tables in Excel.

For what I think is a great take on big picture PowerPoint theory, check out Guy Kawasaki's 10/20/30 rule of PowerPoint. Of course, you're often at your boss's whim when putting together a PowerPoint presentation, but I think Guy makes some great points about how to put together a great presentation. I'm getting a bit off-topic here, but he also wrote a post about how to get a standing ovation when you make a presentation. If you have the ambition and the nerve... try for a standing ovation during your next presentation.

Anyway, just my thoughts on a couple of high-value skills college students sometimes overlook.

Peace!

HYIPS Are Scams

I recently got an innocent-looking comment on one of my posts, and I made the mistake of approving it without checking out the website the person's name linked to. Turns out it was a "how to be a millionaire" blog (yes, another millionaire) and the guy was hyping something I had never heard of before- HYIPs, or high-yield investment programs.

I don't even know where to begin with these. The people who hype stocks all day are at least operating within the bounds of the law. HYIPS are nothing more than fradulent ponzi schemes. There is a great writeup on HYIP scams over at Quatloos, the "cyber museum of scams and frauds."

Basically HYIPs say they will return something like 1% PER DAY on an investment. They tell you that you need to pool your money with other HYIP investors, and your returns will be amazing. Lured in by the promise of easy cash, you send funds to these jokers, they make off with it, and you're left with nothing.

There are so many scams out there, and this one shouldn't be too hard to detect. First of all, any "guaranteed return" above that offered by US Treasury bills (currently around a 5% annual yield) should be looked at with extreme skepticism. Second of all, a simple web search for "HYIP" instantly reveals that they are, in fact, scams. No matter how well people try to dress them up, just remember that these things are just Ponzi schemes.

Take it from someone who has worked for a few Wall Street/financial firms, dealt with very rich people, and lived to tell the tale: there is no "magic bullet." There is no secret investment that rich people have access to that allows them to make a ton of money with no risk. Rich people get rich by having high paying professional jobs, starting their own businesses, inheriting money, buying the right piece of land/stock at the right time, writing best-selling novels, winning the lottery, etc... all of the other ways you already know about. You aren't going to read about the magic solution online. You definitely aren't going to read about the secret on a blog.

The Investment Banker and the Fisherman

I recently read this story about the investment banker and the fisherman on aspirenow.com.

I am not worried about copyright violations because this is one of those "author unknown" stories, so I will just reprint it here.

"The American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, "only a little while."

The American then asked, "Why don't you stay out longer and catch more fish?"

The Mexican replied, "I have enough fish to support my family's immediate needs."

The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, and stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos. I have a full and busy life."

The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. With the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats. Eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA, and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise."

The Mexican fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?"

To which the American replied, "fifteen to twenty years."

"But what then?"

The American laughed and said, "That's the best part. When the time is right, you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich. You would make millions."

"Millions . . . then what?"

The American said, "Then you would retire, move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos.""

Update on 401(k) Rollover

I received an update on my 401(k) rollover today, and it was not great news. Turns out I forgot to fill out one section of my rollover application. They sent that page back to me highlighting where I was supposed to sign.

I think the problem is with their instructions. They actually sent me a form letter that had "forgot to sign section X even though you said you are married" as one of the possible mistakes I made, and that box was checked. Apparently there are about 5 common errors people typically make when filling out this document, and I made one of the 5. It made me wonder: why don't they make it clear that you need to fill out that section if you are married? I guess they find it easier to just have a form letter ready for when you make that mistake.

Anyway, I filled it in promptly and I have it wedged behind the coathanger inside my door (where I keep all the envelopes I intend to mail because it is right in my face as a reminder when I go out). I will mail it out soon. I hope to hear back in another week or so from them. They aren't exactly quick on the turnaround.

When I receive the check from them (around $15k), I will just put it into my new employer's account using the exact same allocation I currently use, so it doesn't throw my percentages off. Then I can forget about it, and I will officially have one less account to worry about!

Working Long Hours

Due to a number of reasons, I had an extremely long, stressful week last week and will likely be having another one next week and possibly the week after.

This week involved waking up at 6am, getting to work around 7:30, working until 6:30, and getting home around 8 or so. One night I didn't get home until 11:30 due to a dinner I had to attend after work. We went to one of the fanciest restaurants in Manhattan with one of our business partners. The bill came out to over $400 a person (I did not have to pay). Unfortunately, at 2am that night I vomited up about $350 worth of the food, but that was probably a good thing.

And I was busy all day at work. I didn't have a chance to catch my breath, and I actually fell behind on a couple of things.

I don't love my work. I like the field I work in, but my current job is definitely not what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. I spent about 65 hours either working or commuting to work this week.

On the local NYC news last night, they were interviewing guys who worked outside. It has been bitter cold this week, with temperatures falling below 0 degrees farenheit. The reporter asked a construction worker "Are you working outside the whole day today?"

He replied "Yep! All day! I'll be out here seven hours!"

I can't imagine what it would be like to work seven hour days. I know a few people who work construction and they leave at the same time as me in the morning, but they are often home from work at 3:00 or 3:30 in the afternoon. This gives them a good 4 hours of extra free time EVERY DAY compared to what I get. This means they actually see daylight in the winter, when it is always dark before I leave work. It means, assuming they go to bed at 10 or 11 pm like I do, that they have seven or eight hours of free time every day, where I only end up with three or four. And during those three or four hours, I usually have some chores to take care of. So I really only get 2 hours to myself every day.

Of course, I am a lot more physically comfortable in a heated office all day, so that's one of the tradeoffs. I don't mean to say those guys have it easy. I worked in construction for a while. It is a tough job. The hours, though, are fantastic.

I don't plan on doing this my entire life. For one, I hope to move someday and cut down my commute to work. For another, I'm going to try to go someplace that offers a more flexible work schedule. For another, I am going to refuse to work the long hours.

For now though, I have a decent enough plan. I'm young, I can work , and hopefully I will be able to save up enough to put down a decent down payment on a house so my monthly payment isn't a noose around my neck.

Tim Russert Interviews Jim Cramer

Piggybacking on my last post, I caught another interesting interview with a famous money manager on TV tonight. Tim Russert had Jim Cramer on his show. Cramer was pushing his new book Jim Cramer's Mad Money: Watch TV, Get Rich.

I always like hearing about how successful people got their start doing what they did. Cramer, as it turns out, wanted to be a prosecutor, so he went to Harvard law school. When he got out of school, he was turned down for a job in Rudi Guliani's organization (at the time Guliani was a DA, or some other kind of state or city prosecutor- I don't remember). Feeling dejected, Cramer went to work for Goldman Sachs in sales and trading where he showed a flair for selling stocks to wealthy individuals, and made $750,000 in his first year. He was 28 or 29 years old at the time.

One thing that he said that struck me was he was getting out of a meeting to go to his sister's "prenuptual dinner." I am guessing that meant the rehearsal dinner for her wedding. A senior guy at Goldman pulled him aside as he was leaving and said "Make your decision right here. Are you a Goldman man?"

Cramer was a Goldman man, and he stayed at work, missing his sister's dinner.

I may be in the minority on this one, but I just don't think $750,000 a year is enough to pay me to take me away from my family. I like having dinner with my wife, and spending time with my brothers, sisters, and parents. There are many different ways to be rich. I consider myself a very rich person as far as family goes.

Anyway, Cramer had some other good thoughts on the markets. He said 100 people control $5 trillion dollars, and effectively control the stock market with it. I have mentioned the great concentration of wealth in this country on this blog before, and I have no doubt that Cramer's guess is in the ballpark. In the short run, these guys move stock prices.

In the long run, however, the underlying earnings power of the company is what will eventually show up in its stock market valuation. Even Cramer agreed with that.

Cramer closed the interview by saying that working for a company in most cases will not make you rich, and that he knows of no better legal way to get rich than investing in the stock market.

Before you get pumped up to transfer your savings over into your Schwab brokerage account, let me present the other side of that coin to you, my friends. The stock market is also a great, legal way to get poor if you end up making the wrong bets. When the 100 guys Cramer mentioned go sour on a stock, it drops 50% in a few weeks and you sell, you will feel pain if you have a considerable portion of your net worth invested in that stock.

One more piece of info to think about. Cramer does not make his money from buying and selling stocks. He makes it from advising other people what stocks to buy and sell. He is selling advice, and he is selling it to anyone and everyone who will buy it. Do you really think it gives you an advantage to get Cramer's stock tips?

I don't.

CNBC: From Great to Ridiculous - Buffett to Ratigan

I had the day off for Martin Luther King day yesterday and was alone in the house so after doing a few chores and things, I put the TV on to see if anything would catch my interest.

CNBC had a documentary on "the history of video games," which I really enjoyed. I played a ton of video games growing up, starting with the Oddysey system and the Commodore 64 when I was a kid. It was interesting to see the business machinations behind the consoles I spent hours on.

One of the commercials advertised a Liz Claman (the host of CNBC's Morning Call ) interview with Warren Buffett coming up at 7pm. As many of you know, I'm a Buffett fan, so I made a mental note to check out the program at that time.

Seven o'clock rolled around and I parked myself in front of CNBC in time to watch the program. It was a pretty good show. Liz basically hung out with Buffett for a day, he showed her around Omaha, Nebraska, and they talked about his life and his philosophy.

The focus of the show seemed to be more on his lifestyle than on his investment guidelines, which was somewhat disappointing to me. He is a billionaire, but he lives a fairly simple life. He likes to go home after work and watch some Nebraska football. He doesn't attend many social events. He doesn't have huge sprawling estates etc... It was all stuff I had heard about before, but it was interesting to see him talking about it in person.

If you were looking for any insights from the program, you were looking in the wrong place. Buffett basically said he looks for businesses with four characteristics: 1) He understands them 2) The management team is competent and ethical 3) They have a sustainable competitive advantage and 4) They are selling at the right price.

For anyone who's read any of the Buffett books, none of this stuff should come as a surprise. The question I'm waiting for someone to answer is EXACTLY how Buffett puts a price on a stock. I know he uses DCF models, but I don't know what his inputs look like. I don't know what he uses as a discount rate, which cash flows he models etc... I know he doesn't subscribe to modern portfolio theory, so he ignores Beta and the CAPM and all of that stuff, but I would basically like to see him price a business. As far as I know, nobody has ever gotten into that level of detail with him.

Anyway, it was a great show full of good old fashioned investing common sense.

That's why I was so shocked when I saw the piece of crap show they put on after it.

I had never seen this particular program before, but the contrast between the Buffett interview and Fast Money, hosted by the god-awful Dylan Ratigan was incredible. Here's how Fast Money describes itself on the CNBC Web site:

"Faster than a New York minute, Dylan Ratigan and the "Fast Money" traders give you the information normally reserved for the Wall Street trading floor, enabling you to make decisions that can make you money. The "Fast Money" five gives you the news, as only the savviest traders can, with an angle that you won’t see until tomorrow’s papers.

Dylan Ratigan serves as "the Commissioner" of Fast Money, orchestrating the dialogue between the four Wall Street traders: Guy Adami, Eric Bolling, Jeff Macke and Tim Strazzini."

This is without a doubt the worst show I have ever seen on CNBC. Even worse than John McEnroe's show. There is something inherently unlikeable about Mr. Ratigan, and I couldn't stand him since the first time I saw him on the channel. I forget when he joined, but im going to guess it was within the past 8 years or so. I can't point to anything in specific, but watch him for 5 minutes and you'll see what I mean.

He surrounds himself with four of these masters of the universe type guys and they all try to talk about trading angles in a back and forth, shoot from the hip style with upbeat rock music playing in the background. The music is supposed to pump you up and get you trading, I assume. The style is kind of like Fox's NFL pregame show with Terry Bradshaw and company, but it is extremely cheesey.

The angle of this particular show was something like "how to trade global conflict and fear." Talk about a ridiculous premise! The guys went around talking about stock investments they would make if the US went to war with Iran, or if the Avian flu broke out. Every minute or so "the Commissioner" Ratigan would butt in and say "BUT HOW DO I TRADE THIS?" That was his contribution, as commissioner. "HOW DO I TRADE THIS?"

Investing is not a game. I am sure these guys got plenty of amateur investors fired up to go buy whover makes Tamiflu, or the OIL exchange-traded fund, but they did not help any actual investors. In fact, I think this show probably does more harm than good.

Honestly, a highschool kid could have made the recommendations these guys made.

One of them in particular, Tim Stazzini, reminded me of every single wall street guy I've ever met and hated in my 7 years working in the finance business. He was smug, he was overconfident, and none of what he said would have been any good to anyone.

On the other end of the spectrum, the guy I probably liked the most was Eric Bolling. Despite the fact that he's a market technician (a practice I think should be outlawed), he made some actual sense when he spoke. I disagreed with his use of charts to predict future stock price movements, but apart from that he gave some reasoned arguments.

I really hope CNBC takes this show off of the air. It's an obvious attempt to imitate the success of Jim Cramer's Mad Money program, except it's not nearly as entertaining as Mad Money. For the record I watch Mad Money every now and then for some info and entertainment, but I wouldn't wager a New York nickel on a stock based on Jim Cramer's recommendation alone.

If you want to grow and protect your savings, read an article about Warren Buffett. If you want to give your commissions to your broker, follow the crowd, lose money on your investments, and waste your time, by all means watch "Fast Money" with The Rat- Dylan Ratigan.